We shouldn’t take ourselves too seriously all the time.
Opinion & Analysis

Satirical journalism isn’t just for laughs

IF COPPERHEAD’s cyber thugs, two-bit academics and army of back-stabbing and double-dealing twisters are to be believed, everyone who disagrees with him is a Red Devil, is captured or a “regime enabler”. And so, it wasn’t a surprise that the Viper’s shrill and Janusfaced social media infl uencers tucked into Apostle Talent Chiwenga with relish this week, after the outspoken cleric censured the Yellow Submarine’s owner for his many obvious failings. To these imbeciles, Talent is now doing the bidding of the Red Devils, notwithstanding the fact that for years he has been taking on the formidable system openly, at a time that many in his position chose to play things safe by hiding behind cyber thugs.

Was Talent Wrong?

If VAR is to be very honest, he did not detect any lies in anything that Talent said. The street preacher was also not the first person to point out the Viper’s many foibles. And neither will he be the last to do so. Indeed, can anyone point out a time when Copperhead led from the front when it mattered, as the indefatigable Morgiza (may his soul continue to rest in peace) used to do? Perhaps even more importantly — given the lay of the land and the way the body politic is shifting — can anyone say with confidence that the Viper has led the opposition movement diligently and determinedly enough to orchestrate a surprise victory over the Red Devils in 2023, as Save did in 2008? Surely something is fundamentally wrong when every voice of reason is seen by the Cult as that of an enemy agent. From Chibaba chema-veggie, to Chofs and the likes of Jacob Ngarivhume, all these people who want to see the Viper and his Cult succeeding next year are being scandalised for pointing out what’s not working.

Personality Cult

Although there is nothing wrong with leaders enjoying mass following, chaos ensues when such leaders and their zealots become so trapped in their deluded belief that their Cult leader is infallible and God-ordained, as is increasingly becoming the case with Copperhead. This is so because once there are personality cults around leaders, accountability disappears and things inevitably go off the rails — as it is diffi cult in such cases for the leaders and their blind followers to accept that the Cult leader is making fatal mistakes. Indeed, history is replete with examples of how charismatic and authoritarian leaders built personality cults around themselves to the point that even when they were jumping off the cliff , their followers insisted on following them into the abyss rather than questioning them about their decisions and actions. VAR is now more convinced than ever that the cult of personality that has taken root in the Secret Sect is worsening rather than mitigating the political chaos in the country.

Oil and Water

What many followers of the Cult are struggling to accept is that personality cults and democracy don’t mix. This is because cults of personality are not just absurd, but also dangerous. In addition to ruling by belief, cult leaders also use the hopes and fears of their followers to create alternate social realities — where control, exploitation and isolation, and sometimes mayhem (like Mazizi cyber thugs on Zwitter), are justified in the name of a supposed higher good. In this madhouse, cult members are required to publicly idolise their leaders and to parrot their lies and toxic behaviour in order to be fully accepted in the Secret Sect and not to suffer ostracisation. We are doomed compatriots.

National Interest

VAR stumbled upon a framework document on South Africa’s national interest this week, which Zimbabwe is well advised to emulate as our teapot country continues to wrestle with its myriad political and economic challenges. In this regard, Mzansi’s national interest is defi ned as the protection and promotion of its national sovereignty and constitutional order, the well-being, safety and prosperity of its citizens, and a better Africa and world. All this is premised on the values and ideals of the country’s constitution — informed by the needs of its people which include the eradication of the legacy of apartheid and overcoming the triple challenges of inequality, unemployment and poverty. How VAR wishes we can also do this to help lance the demons of divisions and toxic politics in our country.

Until next week, Azishe!

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